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0439 - It feels good to help. - 2026.03.02 |
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Comment: Hey, you want me to show you something about the visual language of comics? Those blue rectangular dialogue bubbles are electronic communication, right? We've established, as a matter of canon, that they're smooth and seamless, and while they aren't telepathy per se, for all practical intents and purposes, they might as well be. (I've also mentioned that the humans control these transmissions, at least partially, with subvocal micro-mouth movements, the shadows of muscle impulse that happen when you think of a word, but don't say it. In this case, Lee's body isn't doing those micro movements, they're coming through to Nina's green tongue, and being interpreted there, despite the fact that Nina doesn't normally have to move its mouth to use this form of communication, and, indeed, is not using Lee's tongue to do so. Anyway, you may have noticed that these bubbles normally have little polygons (usually rhombi) surrounding them, connecting them to whichever character is currently speaking. You may also have noticed that those polygons were not present for the long period where we were in blackness, and then only seeing things in first-person POV, and the polygons only came back when we saw the reflection in the TV (hey, that might be symbolic, huh?) and switched back to third person. You may also have noticed... no polygons in panel 3, here. Why not? That is because panel 3, despite the fact that it appears to be coming from a theoretical third person perspective, is, in actuality, a depiction of how Lee is feeling. What I have drawn here is an emotion. That's also why panel 3 includes the hover rig and Sami the Seagull (because the human mind is a wonderfully malleable thing when it comes to tool use, and Lee is already thinking of these things as elements of their own body), but no actual background. Panel 3 is a depiction of how Lee feels, and Lee feels good. And when I say "good", I don't just mean that they're experiencing pleasure or that they're emotionally happy, nor do I just mean that they feel like they are a good person. What's key here is that they feel both of those things at the same time. Lee has certainly felt like a good person (or, at least, like a person who hasn't done anything wrong) very often throughout the strip, usually when they're being afflicted with trials they feel they don't deserve, and they're declaring their own moral goodness as a defense against being made to feel bad. Lee has also felt good sensations and emotions, enjoying TV shows and cuddling and engaging philosophical discussions and sucking body-temperature tap water out of Zoa's gigantic cerulean boobs. But, crucially, there in strip #439, panel 3, Lee feels like a hero. Lee is not merely opposing a bad thing or advocating for a good thing, they are accomplishing something difficult and weird and high-stakes, and if they were to see a fictional character doing what they are doing, they wouldn't just be seeing an NPC or a background extra, they'd be looking at the hero of this story, and heroes deserve to win and to be praised and to be loved. Lee has spent the entire strip looking for love and acceptance and validation (or, at least, to not be hated and judged). They've wanted love from Zoa, they've wanted love from Caleb, they've wanted love from Orb, they've even come around to wanting love from Doc. But, in this moment, Lee has found the love they needed. Lee loves themself. And also, Lee is feeling pleasure and happiness and self-satisfaction and self-actualization, and, perhaps for the first time in their life, if someone were to come yell at them and tell them that they're bad and stupid and that they're doing a bad thing, it would bounce right off of that green smile because Lee would know that that person is simply wrong. Anyone who knows me probably knows that I believe that increasing pleasure and decreasing pain in the universe is a foundational ethical good. I'm not a fan of punishment, as a general rule, but I suppose I do believe that inflicting discomfort or negative emotions in order to dissuade someone from an evil path can, at times, also be an ethical good, even if an awful lot of bad people love to use "punishment" as an excuse to do some pretty transparently evil things. But - and this is rarely appreciated - best of all is the reward. Giving someone praise and accolades and pleasure and resources because they have done a good thing is best of all. It encourages them to do more good in the future. It encourages others to do good in the future. It ripples forward, making the universe a better place. It is not merely justifying harm, it is a booster rocket onto the already-good action of giving pleasure. I don't think we appreciate, as a society, how good of an action it is to give someone a reward for good behaviour. Let me express this another way, because it's rare that I hear anyone say this: rewarding someone for virtue is, in itself, a fundamentally virtuous act. If you see someone do a good thing, you should reward them, because rewarding them is the right thing to do. And Lee is in a virtuous cycle. Since they're at a remove from themself, they can see themself as though through someone else's eyes, and they don't need to have a reshaped nose or smaller boobs to communicate their character through visual design - that's entirely out the window right now - they are seeing actions, and they know that these are the actions of a good person. They feel good and they love themself because the thing that they are doing is good, and it's also good that they feel good about the good that they're doing! The neurochemicals that are flooding into their brainmeat because, even though they can't actually feel it, their prostate is currently being flushed out is not unrelated, I suppose, but I do want to make it clear that it's not the only factor at play, here. There is a lot not to like about Lee Caldavera. I understand that. It has not been by accident. They're kind of a mess, and a bit of an idiot, and, at times, an asshole. But I gotta admit, I'm looking at that third panel as I type this, and... yeah. I agree with Lee. They are behaving heroically, and they do deserve to feel good in this moment, and I do love them. I hope you love them too. Because they're not home yet. |
Announcement: For anyone who follows me on social media (you do follow me on Mastodon and BlueSky, don't you?), you probably all know that I'm utterly obsessed with the videogame Disco Elysium. Did you know that I sometimes write fanfic about it, too? I put it over where fanfic goes, on AO3. (I only recommend reading if, like me, you already know quite a bit about the game. Not only is it spoileriffic, it straight up wouldn't make sense unless you knew the things I'm referencing.) |
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