0337 - Sorry. - 2024.03.18



Yes, even in the future, the "Canadians say sorry" joke endures, regardless of how accurate it may be. I've heard it said that it's a consequence of the Canadian vs American healthcare systems, i.e., Americans can't afford to say "sorry" because it constitutes admitting fault, and if you admit fault, then you're on the hook for someone else's hospital bill.

I don't know that that's the case. I mean, Canada's nationalized healthcare is younger than I am, surely stereotypes take longer to develop than that, don't they?


0337 – 2167/07/07/09:53 - Rosenthal College hex
LC: Wait… hang on, scrolling back through messages… there! You said I squeezed your arm hard enough to activate your dermal defense grid, right? And then Pamela and Quip got you so emotionally riled up that it activated your cortisol thingie, and it considered me a hostile combatant, yes?
CP: The terms you are using are inexact, but the sequence of events you are attempting to describe have occurred, yes.
LC: But… you’re not allowed to hurt a human being, and I’m a human being. A citizen of the same nation, in fact, if that matters.
CP: It does not.
LC: So… you’re locked down now.
CP: I have entered an alternate mental and physical state designed to prevent culpability for any and all forms of physical confrontation, and to render human injury unlikely.
LC: Yeah, but, see… we have to get to class now. We have less than ten minutes, and my feet are in casts, and I… uh… I will come to harm if I don’t attend class on time?
CP: Incorrect. You may be expelled from auditing Intro To Western Philosophy at Rosenthal College, and, as a result, evicted from your current dwelling, but the Canadian government will continue to allot you sufficient Canadian Consumer Credits to afford lodging, food, and the necessities of life. You will be neither physically injured nor financially impacted.
LC: Well, yeah, technically, but I’ll be emotionally impacted! Like, a lot! Don’t you care about that?
CP: My current mental and physical state does not take into account whether or not you are sad, Mezzer Caldavera, especially considering that you tend to periodically exhibit significant emotional distress regardless of your living arrangements, social milieu, financial situation, or physical state.
CP: I am, however, able to offer legally non-binding apologies for your current circumstances.
CP: Sorry.
LC: Yeah, you were programmed by a Canadian, alright.