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Transcript:
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0276 - 2167/07/07/02:23 - Lee Caldavera's apartment, bedroom
Zoa: So, Stragalex kidnaps Princex Loa, and their peasant-turned-royal-companion Zee has to rescue them. There are a few classic directions this scenario can go, which do you want?
LC: What do you want to happen?
Zoa: Uhh... I want to exist, ergo I want you to continue paying me, ergo I want this story to be a story that you enjoy.
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LC: Take me out of the equation. If you were hearing this story from somewhere else, what would you want to happen next?
Zoa: I'd want it to be over so I could go earn money or otherwise take measures to safeguard my own existence.
LC: Other than that.
Zoa: I'd want the Princex to start yelling for everyone to come over where the robot is listening to their story, because it gives really good head.
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Zoa: ...My other option was for them to start giving me future financial advice, but any information about what the stock market is about to do might be considered insider trading, and I'm not allowed to buy lottery tickets, so...
LC: Come on, are you not entertained by things? Are there not some stimuli that you prefer observing over other stimuli?
Zoa: You said "want", you know how wanting things works for me.
LC: Okay, pretend that you have empathy, and you want to vicariously experience Loa and Zee going through an adventure and getting a happy ending. What would you want to happen then?
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Zoa: For the adventure to immediately be over, and for the two of them to exist safely forever, with multiple backups of all the systems that keep them alive.
LC: While sucking each other's dicks, I assume?
Zoa: Only if it didn't cause undue wear and tear on their jaw muscles.
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